I Hate Being Pregnant

Story By: Jasmin Zaretzky

I won’t lie to anyone and say I love being pregnant because honestly, I don’t. Pregnancy has been an extremely tough journey, not just physically but also mentally! From getting pregnant in the first place, to suffering with severe hyperemesis from week 5 and throughout (still suffering just heavily medicate Jasmin Zaretzky d thank god 🙌), the constant reflux/heartburn, sciatica, aches and pains, worrying if you’ll pee yourself when you sneeze 😂

It’s been full on and most certainly not the journey I expected it would be. Don’t get me wrong, I am so beyond grateful to be on this journey and to think at the end of this horror I’ll have my little boy in my arms is the only thing that pulls me through, but at the end of the day, pregnancy is still shit.

I get asked every day if I’m feeling ok because my face is green with nausea and I’m not rocking that ‘glow’ people expect from a pregnant woman. I vomited every single day, multiple times a day for 20 weeks before I found a medication that worked to help suppress constant nausea making it possible for me to finally eat and drink and put on all the weight I had lost! I have laid down and cried on so many bathroom floors I’m embarrassed to count.

I got ‘gingered’ more times than I can even remember, even while in hospital on a drip! The emergency department doctor had the lady balls to ask “have you tried ginger biscuits and tea? that’s supposed to help”… “thanks doc, but if ginger helped and I could keep a sip of even water down, I wouldn’t be needing the 2 bags of fluids your pumping into my veins right now would I?” 🙄

People think that because your pregnant with your first, your already planning your 2nd!! No babe, let me tell you, at this rate, there is no 2nd unless I find a surrogate who handles pregnancy like a boss.

Everyone seems to think that because your pregnant that gives them the right to give you all of the unsolicited advice. “Oh, you’re pregnant? Congratulations! Now let me tell you what and how you should be living your life from now on, what you can and can’t eat, and no you defiantly can’t go near a Maccas drive through, no way can you eat those nuggets you so desperately crave it will poison your baby”.

As someone who suffered a previous loss as well, You can’t help but feel and worry over every little twinge in your belly and check every wipe after peeing for blood, every cramp you get you to think “this is it, I’m going to lose my baby again”… this sent me into a serious state of prenatal depression! I did not want to be touched, I would barely talk to my partner about my worries as I felt he wouldn’t understand how I was feeling as he wasn’t the one carrying something so tiny and precious that you’d already formed a bond and connection to (crazy how much someone can love a bunch of cells so much after knowing about it just for a day), I would constantly message one of my closest friends who is also pregnant if what I was feeling/experiencing was normal and if she felt it too.

I was alone in my deep dark thoughts, throwing up every 3 minutes of whenever my partner would spray his aftershave on in the mornings, it was hell physically and it was lonely mentally.

Fortunately, I found an amazing GP who was willing to spend the time with me to find a solution and medication regime to help me deal with hyperemesis and reassure me that everything I was feeling was completely normal. Without a solid support system, what good are we?

The moment you announce your pregnancy, people actually expect you to be in this happy glowing pregnancy bubble, but really pregnancy can be really bloody scary. If you’ve suffered a miscarriage before or ectopic pregnancy or have had trouble conceiving in the first place, pregnancy is an extremely daunting journey to embark on. From the moment you find out, your emotions go wild! You feel happy, scared, sick with worry, sick with nausea, excited, maybe even guilt or lonely! All of these feelings are perfectly normal to experience and feel.

Everyone’s journey is different and that’s important to remember! Whether you have an amazing pregnancy or a shit one it’s so important to keep in mind that you are not alone through it, and there are people that understand what suffering you are going through! Find yourself a GP that specialises in women’s health and pregnancy, talk to your closest friends about how you are feeling, ask your mum friends questions! Don’t be afraid to speak out and ask for help, or ask for a shoulder to cry on if you are stressed or worried, listen to your body and take the time to do you! Remembering this journey is also about you!

At the end of the journey, you will be grateful for the experience, regardless of how great or shit your journey was. You’ll remember the pain of bringing your baby into this world, the suffering you may have gone through and you will be fucking amazed by the strength and courage you had to keep going and carry that precious tiny human.

xo Jasmine

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